June 2012
87 posts
ablogotto replied to your post: 7. My favorite book, 14. What my greatest achievement is, 20. Favorite flavor of ice cream, 29. Most embarrassing moment, 38. What I’m really good at
its true not much embarrasses Ali
I done told y’all.
subjugasian asked: 7. My favorite book, 14. What my greatest achievement is, 20. Favorite flavor of ice cream, 29. Most embarrassing moment, 38. What I’m really good at
The turf war with this squirrel has been growing for the last few months. He used to threaten me from way up in trees, but this week he’s been within 3 feet of me, making his weird clicking noises and shaking his tale. I’ve named him Roger. He’s an asshole.
May 2012
69 posts
lyall replied to your post: WHY.
LOL @ drinking age of 21 in USA :P
Before I was 21, I hated that every other country got to drink before I did. Now that I’m 26 and I see what idiots these kids are, I love it. These little shits are obnoxious enough; they don’t need any liquor!
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WHY.
A message from a child on OKCupid:
18 year old male living in porter ranch and let me say you sound amazing and look it too =]! i hate these dating sites .. but ima give it a try. You sound amazing and your beer knowledge sounds impressing and actually turns me on a lil =]. hit me back up
I am 8 years older than this dude. He’s 3 years from legally being allowed to drink. The only...
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A few days ago, I started writing a positive post about a shitty situation. Before I could finish it, something happened that shifted my perspective about the whole thing.
There are some things that won’t ever be fixed.
You can give it your all, but if the pieces don’t fit, no amount of pushing is going to change that.
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I love this dog. She’s lazier than me.
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Pecos: How long is that Crown Books going to be going out of business?
Me: As long as it takes to sell the rest of the books.
Pecos: Go in there, there's only a handful of books left.
Me: And they're all Sarah Palin's biography.
Pecos: That looks like a tour bus! I wonder whose it is..
Me: Sarah Palin, she's come to pick up her books!
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Excuse my horribly annoying voice and watch this sucker twirl!
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A moment to be thankful
As much as I whine and complain about how much I hate the SFV, we really lucked out with where we’re living.
Our landlord invites us over for dinner and scavenges around her house for booze because she knows we’re drinkers. She is always interested in how we’ve been and asks about things we’ve previously talked about for an update.
Molly, her daughter, is spazzy and...
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Bullshit →
The only thing that this “startling discovery” shows is why homeboy was eating Skittles. This new information is pretty fucking irreverent.
Jess: What's a good recipe for green beans?
Me: Bacon.
Ideas
Thinking that I’m going to spend the weekend prowling WWOOF.org for local farms that might need some weekend help.
I’m real excited.
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The downside of being open about your depression is that you will occasionally run into people that will use that information against you.
No one ever tells you that.
Me: Where is the oleander that you want Pecos to cut down?
Reg: In the front yard.
Me: We don't have an oleander in the front yard.
Reg: Yes, we do. Remember we drove by it and I was like, man, that thing is dead.
Me: Ohh! The DEAD tree. That's what you should've put. Because that thing does not look like an oleander, it's just a trunk.
Reg: haha! I guess you're right.
Pet peeve: Repeating myself
Me: This form doesn't have room for your notes, what would you like me to do?
Reg: Oh, don't worry about it. I'm going to write it.
Me: Write what?
Reg: A cover letter.
Me: No, I'm talking about the notes you have written about the plants.
Reg: Okay, what about them?
Me: *deep breath, then quickly* THERE'S NOT A PLACE FOR THEM, WHERE SHOULD I PUT THEM?
I could write a lengthy post (and perhaps I still might) but I thought my texts to Jamie kind of summed up my whole deal:
Me: He just seems like he’s trying too hard.
Me: It makes me feel like I felt with Jim in the beginning. Dude is just too into me. ‘Cept I really needed someone to take me away from Jeff and Jim filled that void. Now, I don’t have any unrequited love to suppress, so I ain’t...
A mean thing I've said to Penny
*chuckling* haha! It’s so obvious what you’ve come for, little dog! But that means you get nothing. NOTHING!
Forever waiting for the day when people stop allowing themselves to be controlled by whatever shit happened in their childhood.
This isn’t a competition. This isn’t about who suffered more and for how long.
No one gives a single fuck.
So it’s time that you stop, too.
And this isn’t a plea to ignore, to suppress. No, instead, it’s a plea to let that shit out....